I don't know if It's just because I'm a stone hearted brick wall that I get irritated when people try and give me marriage/life advice, or it's because I'm a sickly, overly obsessive, independent woman dependent on my husband for the help I truly need.
Lets throw down some facts, because real talk, there are some facts.
I grew up in a family where I could pretty much make my own choices, at a young age (8) I learned humility and patience watching and helping my mother provide care for an alzeheimers patient (with shawn and his mom) from her early stages to her passing. I learned from my father that working hard, getting the job done the best it can be, working with precision and having patience are qualities that I should strive to obtain, because they will get me far. My home was filled with creative energies and big aspirations. Every one of us always consumed in some sort of art that would be send away to someones home or garnishing our walls so we could smile at them every time we would see them.
My mom and dad always hold hands, always, and I have never once in my life ever heard them fight towards one another, about one another faults. My daddy would always bring momma flowers he picked, and he kept the yards beautiful and pristine, a magical sanctuary for us to meditate, and relax in.
They raised us in the trees, where the forest outstretched for miles and hugged the shore line. They let us run free, be wild, howl at the moon, be young, be us. We would climb trees until every pair of our pants were torn, matching my daddies ripped at the knee jeans from being on his knees building all day. Our hands were always dirty, covered with earth, and life, like my mothers paint splatted fingertips from creating beautiful things.
A lot of the times there would be struggles, but more plentiful love that got us through it. Money was not vastly plentiful, but smiles were. My momma would get creative in the kitchen with the remaining things we had to make sure even though there wasn't a lot, there was fun to be had with it.
We were raised to be whoever we wanted to be. There were no real restrictions on our desires.
With that. I learned to be who I am. I survive off accomplishing things, growing, learning how to better myself as a person, as an artist, and now I can take the love that they have shown me and apply that to being a better wife to my husband I have know before this life, and will be with me until every last star in the sky dissipates.
I don't spend one moment of my time reading any of the articles that pop up on my social media pages "how to be in a good relationship" "how to be a better wife" "what to do to have a happy marriage"
I have such an aversion to those things, and sometimes cringe when I see them. They're cool to people that need that stuff, but I'm different, shawn and I are different.
Shawn and I were just born for each other. Our lives just melted together so instantaneously it's really hard to even go back and think about where it all began. We don't learn by example of strangers, we learn by experience that we face, and by the example of our families.
Our families don't give us advice, because they know as husband and wife we already know what we need to. Our mindset and the way we lived out life for the longest time has been so much about already understanding and knowing.
I guess what I am saying is. Not most people get married at this age and don't need to learn anything new about their spouse. We grew up as individuals and as one, together in spirit and in heart our entire lives. We learn together. We have been through so many trials with our families and watching and being a part of them during difficult times and doing what we can to be a help in those days shapes the simple flow of our union.
I guess what I am trying to get across here is, I don't need advice from strangers to live my life a way that someone else sees it right, or how it should work, or what works for them. We are all different, and I know especially that Shawn and I already know what we are doing.
I'm not saying we know it all though. Surly we are only kids, and have much to learn, but the knowledge we know already will take us far.
We never lived in a sheltered bubble that gave us a cushiony, fake life experience, and I am so grateful for that, because now that we are adults, we have no fear of what is to come, because we know so much of what to expect.
There is so much satisfaction for me to figure things out and get things accomplished on my own, learning on my love in times of need. I know if I don't have something I want or need, there is always a way to obtain it.
life yo life for yo self breh.